The Need to Fix Our Self


Needing or wanting to fix our self usually comes from a core belief that we are broken or that there is something wrong with us. We want to run away as fast as possible from the feeling this belief creates. The more we run and avoid the feeling, the more the feeling chases us. It can seem like we are never going to "get rid of it".

Why does it feel as if the feeling is chasing us? Because it has never been felt. It has not been felt because it was too painful, it was too much to cope with at the time and the necessary resources to feel that feeling were not there. So the feeling and experience remains suspended and frozen in time. Our bodies and minds will always look to regain equilibrium and one of the best ways to do that, is to feel that feeling. It can seem as if this feeling is following us around like a shadow, lurking in dark corners and that can scare us. But if we remember that the only reason it looks this way is because that feeling needs healing, it needs to be experienced, it can help us dissolve any fear we have about feeling the feeling. It may still be painful but we find the courage to feel it as we know this is where the solution lies.

Healing is not about fixing or "curing" anything. It is about remembering, or putting the pieces or members back together again, re-member . It's about being who you really are. The you that is underneath and covered by all the beliefs, all the thoughts, all the memories, all the events and all the emotions that you think define who you are. The thing is we identify with these beliefs which are usually limiting and critical. We believe we are these beliefs. We hold the false belief that what happens to us IS us.

Examine your beliefs and where they came from. Without evidence — events — we would not hold these beliefs. We can use EFT on the painful events and beliefs to dissolve them and feel free.

Noreen Barron